I think the thing that people don’t see all the time is the self doubt and the mental struggles that go along with being an entrepreneur/ stay at home mom/ housewife. It’s been a massive struggle to get out of my mind and to not let the self doubt take over. There’s overwhelming moments where I feel just the massive desire to give up on my “career.” This year has truly taken such a toll and its been one of the most difficult years of my life. Which speaks volumes when you sit back and think I lost a child, then 6 months later almost died with my other child and 2 weeks later lost my dad. Now that was the most difficult year of my life. But this year, it’s sadly competing with that year.
The self doubt takes over is such strong waves. I’ve been feeling this sense of drowning in the “I can’t”, the self doubt, the realization that maybe this isn’t what I am supposed to be doing. But how do you change the thoughts when you feel so strongly that this is the career for you? How do you not let those thoughts pull you down?
I don’t have the answers. I have the raw, unfiltered thoughts that run through my mind in the evening hours when the devil runs wild in your brain. He grabs hold of those doubts and runs like crazy. He twists them to fit his narrative and pushes you to the limits negative thoughts.
To be completely honest, I’m doubting myself mad strong here. I’m being open and honest with you all. Some nights I just want to throw in the towel. I’ll use the techniques to get my mind back into the best spot but to be honest, some nights the biggest struggle with being an entrepreneur is the mental game.
Here’s an honest glimpse into my world. I don’t have it all together. I’m not perfect. I show that often but some nights can be worse than others. Tonight is one of those nights. Tomorrow I will wake up and start back to the fighting! I mean that’s what you do when you have a passion.